


To Be Together

by Sphenimersus



Category: The Voice (US) RPF
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Based On Quotes, Based on Songs, Eventual Happy Ending, M/M, Protective Blake, Sad, Sick Adam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2014-12-26
Packaged: 2018-02-05 17:26:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 8,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1826269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sphenimersus/pseuds/Sphenimersus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blake broke up with Adam, but they're still friends. Adam doesn't like being just friends with him, but he deals with it because he still wants the big oaf arond. No matter how much it hurts.</p><p>Each chapter will be based on a song or a quote.</p><p>Was "Behind These Hazel Eyes."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All the people are how I imagine them and this is completely fictional.
> 
> Enjoy reading.

"I'm sorry, Adam," Blake says. "But I can't have a divorce with Miranda."

Adam's pupils widen, lip quivering, "Why?"

Blake's answer breaks his heart, "I love her."

"Get out," Adam states, turning around. Tears threaten to pour out right then and there, but Adam thinks,  _I can't cry. Not now. Not ever. Not in front of someone who broke up with me._ "Get out of my house _now,_ " he demands.

"Can't we still be friends?" Blake asks.

Adam resists the urge to laugh at the cliched line. He once read something about the worst thing that someone could do to you isn't break up with you. It's breaking up and then trying to be friends. How true that is.

"Baby, I'm not leaving 'till you answer." Blake says. They have a few silent minutes.

 Adam's nerves finally snap, and he spits out, "Fine! The non-sexual, platonic friends we used to be! Just get out of my house! And don't _ever_ use those pet names after this!"

"Goodbye, Adam. I'll leave your keys under the potted plant." Blake leaves and locks the door.

Adam hopes that Blake will come back. That this is just a mean joke. But there's no Blake in the next 5 minutes, and reality hits him. He begins screaming, sobbing, letting the tears poor down his cheeks. He walks to the balcony, contemplating on jumping off. He falls down to the abyss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song part will be in the next chapter.


	2. Behind These Hazel Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Road trip to Austin and back to visit my sister who's currently working in there. Hope you like this.

Adam wakes with a jolt; tears spread out among his facial features; a soundless scream stuck in his throat. That dream again. It happened 2 years ago, but it feels like it just happened. They were only together for half a year, but Blake used to give him support. Adam was able to truly smile.

*Seems like just yesterday*  
*You were a part of me*  
*I used to stand so tall*  
*I used to be so strong*

Whenever Adam had a bad dream, Blake used to hug him, calm him.

*Your arms around me tight*  
*Everything, it felt so right*  
*Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong*

But now, two years since they’ve seen each other off set, Adam is still in pain. Yes, he’s married to Behati, but she’s hardly ‘home’. Technically, they’re still married, but ever since she realized she’s just a replacement, she decided to stay elsewhere. Meaning, since Adam panicked when he saw Blake. Or when Adam stayed up 24/7. She never really minded the latter until he admitted his true feeling on their honeymoon.

*Now I can't breathe*  
*No, I can't sleep*  
*I'm barely hanging on*

Adam cleans up and gets ready to leave for the next recording for “The Voice.” The two still flirt with each other on the show; they still talk, but Adam is hurting. His heart was ripped apart. He won’t be the wimp from before Blake, insisting he’s straight. He’s willing to admit that he loved, no, loves Blake – just not out loud. He truly believed they were soul mates.

*Here I am, once again*  
*I'm torn into pieces*  
*Can't deny it, can't pretend*  
*Just thought you were the one*

It hurts, yes, but Adam will hide it forever if it means he can talk with the Sasquatch. Bury the feelings under everything going on in life. He won’t cry if it means he can see Blake. He’ll conceal them for eternity and never, ever let Blake see his broken self.

*Broken up, deep inside*  
*But you won’t get to see the tears I cry*  
*Behind these hazel eyes*

He’s at the set, and he greets Blake, “Hey Big Country!” False happiness in his voice that sounds real, he asks, “How are you?”

Blake grins, “Great! The contestants for season 7 are the best yet. What ‘bout you rock star?”

Adam stares at Blake’s blue eyes, trying to read them. They tell him that all his secrets that he once said were forgotten. All the words that once comforted him killed him now. “I’m fine,” Adam plasters a fake smile. “Bet I’m going to win this season.”

“We’ll see ‘bout that,” Blake laughs. “By the way, great job on your single, ‘Maps’. See you later!”

“Thanks!” And then Adam echoes, “See you…” _But before that I’ll put my heart back together. Again._ He laughs bitterly after that. He whispers to himself, “I wonder if you know that ‘Maps’ was meant for you.”

*I told you everything*  
*Opened up and let you in*  
*You made me feel alright*  
*For once in my life*  
*Now all that's left of me*  
*Is what I pretend to be*  
*So together, but so broken up inside*

Adam goes to his dressing room and starts gasping for air. A reaction to Blake that Adam has been trying to control. He’s been relatively successful in doing it whenever he’s alone. He asks himself again, _Why? Why do you keep me up at night?_ Every day, Blake keeps Adam on the edge of the cliff. He searches for the bottom of the seemingly endless drop.

*’Cause I can't breathe*  
*No, I can't sleep*  
*I'm barely hangin' on*

He leaves the room for the stage. There, at that spot, with Blake again. His face shows nothing of his emotional injuries. He’ll keep his true feelings out of sight regardless of what people say. The bits and pieces of his heart that chip off every second. The tears he won’t allow to escape. He’ll never let anyone know.

*Here I am, once again*  
*I'm torn into pieces*  
*Can't deny it, can't pretend*  
*Just thought you were the one*  
*Broken up, deep inside*  
*But you won't get to see the tears I cry*  
*Behind these hazel eyes*

Adam watches the singer as well as the occasional glance at Blake. He remembers those times where their tongues have been down each other’s throat.

*Swallow me then spit me out*

He despises Blake for leaving him. But he can’t accuse Blake of anything. All he can think of is, _Was I not enough?_

*For hating you, I blame myself*

The end of the song is here, and Adam puts his attention back to the contestants. He can’t stand watching Blake, but he does it anyway. Despite of how it feels. Despite the pain. Despite _everything_ that happens.

*Seeing you it kills me now*  
*No, I don't cry on the outside*  
*Anymore...*  
*Anymore...*

Adam knows this will happen again and again and again. An endless cycle. Until death, but even then, it will exist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song:  
> "Behind These Hazel Eyes" by Kelly Clarkson
> 
> BTW if you want me to continue this, please comment below.


	3. Feelings That Cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Just because my eyes don't have tears, doesn't mean my heart doesn't cry." ~@1stLove
> 
> "How are you?" "s̶a̶d̶,̶ ̶b̶r̶o̶k̶e̶n̶,̶ ̶d̶e̶f̶e̶a̶t̶e̶d̶,̶ ̶c̶r̶u̶s̶h̶e̶d̶,̶ ̶l̶o̶n̶e̶l̶y̶,̶ ̶f̶a̶l̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶p̶a̶r̶t̶" "I'm fine." ~@femalebook

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry I haven't updated this in forever. I've finally decided what to do with my multi-chaptered fics. I'm going to finish this. Then Lost, and after that, High School Mess. Eventually, I'll be working on another multi-chapter fic for another fandom and then I'll work on the second part of the series "In The Long Run."
> 
> There's still a lot of angst in this, and I don't think it'll be happy anytime soon. (this is still a work in progress)
> 
> Bonus: I'm posting two chapters today.

Adam dances with Gwen, enjoying the party after a recording for The Voice. She’s a lot of fun to be with and an amazing woman. Just like Christina and Shakira, whenever she wants a contestant, she’ll fight hard and joke around all at once. It’s fantastic.

It’s the next song, and Adam moves on to Pharrell. They don’t dance, but they do talk. Pharrell asks, “You gonna dance with Blake?”

Adam freezes for half a second and forces out a smile, “Nah, I think I’ve had enough dances with him in the studio.”

Sighing, Adam asks the bartender for a glass of tequila. He brings his drink with him to a couch in the back corner. He tries to not look for Blake, but his eyes automatically wander to Blake while he sips his alcohol. It can’t be helped; it’s an instinctive reaction Adam has when Blake is in the same room. One thing that he notices is that, this season, Miranda’s not with Blake. Adam unconsciously stands up and moves to where Blake is sitting at the bar. _How long has he been there?_ Adam wonders. When he realizes that he’s standing in the middle of the dance floor, Adam tears his eyes off Blake and walks in the opposite direction.

Only problem is that Blake spots Adam the moment he turns around squeezing his way through people. Blake grins, waving to his fellow coach. “Hey, Adam! How ya doin’ buddy?”

Adam turns around and gives a strained smile, “I’m feeling great.” He tries to mentally convey his true feelings to Blake though – thinking _sad, depressed, broken, lonely, soon to be suicidal?_

Of course, Blake doesn’t hear the mental message nor does he even have an intuitive thought of the possibility. He simply grabs Adam and lifts the younger man with little effort. “C’mon rock star, let’s dance. Can’t waste a party!”

Adam struggles to escape Blake’s grip and half-shouts, “No thanks cowboy! You know I have two left feet.” He squirms while Blake completely ignores the comment and drags him on to the dance floor.

Blake wraps his arm around the shorter man, Adam unknowingly relaxes into the taller man’s frame. However, his mind races, _What’s going on?! I’m going to panic soon. I know it._ True to his thoughts, halfway through the song they’re dancing to, Adam pushes Blake away causing shouts of complaints from the other club customers.

Completely oblivious to the racket around them, Blake stares at Adam, confused, “What’s wrong buddy?” Hurt is evident in his voice.

Adam wants to frown and growl “asshole” to the older man, but he refrains himself from saying it and smiles painfully. “Sorry dud, bad stomach. I’ll be leaving early today. See you later.”

Blake let’s his shoulder relax but still asks about Adam. “You sure? I could take you back if you want to. I mean, it’ll be hard to drive back home if your stomach hurts.”

Rolling his eyes, Adam replies, “I’ll be fine _mom_. I took the taxi today. Bye.” Adam ensures that he leaves in a quick and easy fashion.

“You sure?” Blake asks, still concerned and oblivious to Adam’s emotions.

Adam’s tempted to say ‘No, I’m feeling sad, broken, defeated, crushed, lonely, and I’m falling apart. How about you fix what you did?’ But Adam doesn’t do anything except give a realistic smile. “I’ll be fine. I’ll call if I feel worse.”

Blake grins, “You do that. See ya.”

Adam waves back and leaves the club. He hails a cab and heads back home. As soon as he’s in his house, Adam crumbles to the floor, his false smile still plastered to his face. He’s been convincing others that he’s fine and now he’s starting to believe himself. But he _knows_ he’s not fine. Even if his expression appears to be one of happiness, he _knows_ his heart is still being broken – piece by piece. Even after two years.


	4. I Miss You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I miss spending time with you. I miss when we laughed together. I miss hugging and I miss cuddling. I miss you." ~@LoveInfinitelX

As soon as Adam leaves, Gwen comes up to Blake and asks, "What's wrong?" She noticed Blake grabbing Adam and they were enjoying their short time on the dance floor before Adam left. He didn't look very well, so she brushed it off as bad food. But she also saw the slightly pained look behind the eyes of a concerned Blake.

Blake turned to her with eyes that seemed like a child only to smother the hurt in his eyes with false happiness, “Nothin’. Just wonerin’ if Adam’ll get back home okay.”

Gwen shrugs, “Okay. But remember this, you can always to talk to me. I can be your Mama Bear.” She winks and struts off to take Pharell with her.

Now Blake is the only coach from _The Voice_ left in the club. Carson left earlier to be with his family and most of the people in the club are strangers. He drinks the third – fourth? – maybe fifth mug of beer for the night. Before he gets lost in his thoughts, he manages to leave for his house in L.A.

Stumbling into the house, Blake plops down on to the couch. He stares at the ceiling and gets lost in his thoughts. His mind goes back to the time when he and Adam were still together.

* * *

Blake grunted when Adam jumped on to his back. Adam was laughing with such joy; Blake couldn’t get mad at the unexpected pounce. He sighed and carried his boyfriend to the couch, kissing Adam as soon as he’s on the couch.

-o-

Adam was laughing at the stupidest joke Blake had ever made

-o-

The two were giggling in the bed after their first night of sex.

-o-

Christina was watching them and she just seemed to _know_ about their relationship. She smiled at them.

-o-

Adam was being patient with Blake and his situation. Blake thought that Adam shouldn’t be like that. It had almost been a year.

-o-

Blake was talking with Miranda, grinning like a dumb fool. He wanted to tell his unsuspecting wife, but he couldn’t bring himself to break her heart.

-o-

Blake was in Adam’s bedroom – it was two in the morning. He was standing at the door while Adam groggily got out of the bed to greet him. But Blake spoke before Adam could cross the room. “I’m sorry, Adam. But I can’t have a divorce with Miranda.”

Adam jolted up, eyes widening when tears threatened to rise, “Why?”

Blake didn’t know what to say, so he said the partial truth, “I love her.”

“Get out, get out of my house _now_ ,” Adam demanded after turning his back Blake.

Blake knew what he was about to ask was stupid, but he still wanted it to be possible. “Can’t we still be friends?” After being ignored, Blake continued with an endearment, “Baby, I ain’t leavin’ ‘till you answer.”

Adam tried to continue ignoring Blake, but he broke the silence by yelling, “Fine! The non-sexual, platonic friends we used to be! Just get out of my house! And don’t _ever_ use those pet names after this!”

As cheesy as it might sound, Blake replied, “Good-bye, Adam. I’ll leave your keys under the potted plant.” He exited the house and locked the door. He stood there waiting to see if Adam was actually hurt. He could hear some of Adam’s wrecked screams when he turned up the engine of his truck. Feeling guilt and a bit of regret, Blake thought about going back in to comfort the one he has been with for the past year. But he knew it’d only cause more pain, so he left the broken man behind as he drove away silently.

* * *

 Blake jolts awake from his slumber. His head is pounding, but he remembers the flashbacks. Now, Miranda has left him for someone who completely loves her. When she broke the news that they couldn’t be together anymore, she said, “You love me, but you’re not _in_ love with me. We both know your heart belongs to someone else.”

His reaction consisted of “I love you.” “How’d you know?” And “I’m sorry. I really do love you.”

The smile from his ex-wife was heartbreaking, “I know you love me Blake, but you’re in love with _Adam_. You always have been since you met him.”

The trip down memory lane is beginning to affect his tear glands. He cries openly, something he hasn’t done in years. Blake knows he’s screwed up his relationships. He’s crushed the hearts of people he loves dearly. He knows all this, but he can’t help but feel selfish, thinking, _I miss Adam. The way we were before. The laughter we share now hasn’t reached his eyes since_ that _time. Why did I ever break up with him? I’m so stupid. I still want him with me. I want him. I miss him. I love him. I’m_ in _love with Adam Levine. Why didn’t I realize this sooner?_


	5. Airplanes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I could really use a wish right now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is probably the shortest chapter I've written, so I'm posting two chapters again.
> 
> I'm only using the chorus from this song.
> 
> Enjoy reading!

*Can we pretend that airplanes*  
*In the night sky are like shooting stars?*  
*I could really use a wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Can we pretend that airplanes*  
*In the night sky*  
*Are like shooting stars?*  
*I could really use a wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Wish right now*

Adam stares up at the stars, watching from his balcony while drowning himself in alcohol for the night. He feels somewhat content, but he knows something – someone – is missing. He wants that person with him now. Why isn’t that person with him he wonders. He quietly prays for a falling sar – a shooting star. He sees the airplanes of L.A. coming in and leaving. He wonders if making a wish while watching those vehicles fly would be the same as when he does it to a real shooting star. Just like that one wish from the night he first made love with Blake.

* * *

*Can we pretend that airplanes*  
*In the night sky are like shooting stars?*  
*I could really use a wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Can we pretend that airplanes*  
*In the night sky*  
*Are like shooting stars?*  
*I could really use a wish right now*  
*Wish right now*  
*Wish right now*

Blake is lying across the grass next to his truck. He’s at some forest he found the big city of Los Angeles. He thinks of the time when he wrapped his arm around a lover in the night, staring at the stars. He remembers that night because there was an airplane descending that seemed like a shooting star in slow motion. Blake and his partner made a wish that night. They never told each other of the wish they made. He remembers making love to that partner – their confessions happened here, their first kiss, their first time with each other. That partner was Adam.

Blake chuckles because he knows having their firsts with each other out in the woods isn’t exactly ideal but screw that. He and Adam never went with stereotypes. But then he remembers that he _is_ a stereotype – a stereotypical country man. Hell, a stereotypical man. He chose to cut off the secret lover, rather than his spouse. In the end, he was divorced by his wife and now he wants to get back with his ex-lover. Isn’t that a pretty common trend in those damned romance novels?

Sighing, Blake watches as the airplanes come and go, hoping that Adam is seeing the same scene. Hoping that, soon, Adam will trust him with the heart that was shattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song:  
> "Airplanes" by B.O.B. ft. Haley Williams
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	6. Mornings and Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprise visit by an old friend, and an announcement to be made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Some reference to self-esteem issues are mentioned in this chapter.*  
> A warning for that, just in case.
> 
> Enjoy reading! :)

Waking up to his phone’s alarm, Adam groans and tumbles off the chair he’s been laying in all night. His head feels as though the freaking _world_ dropped on him. He sighs and remembers how Blake had held him last night before he left. He longs to be in the arms of that big oaf again, but being in the same room as the older man makes the emotional part of his mind act up.  His heart hurts so much, but he also knows that he’d feel better if Blake were with him when he woke up.

Crawling back to his room, Adam reaches for the water bottle he always kept on his night stand. He stumbles to his bathroom and turns on the warm water. He uses the counter to reach the cabinet with medicine, so he can dim the oncoming headache. He winces when the bottles all tumble down ad searches for that one pill bottle. After swallowing a pill with water, Adam relishes in the warm water spraying from his shower.

He thinks about the past and half-cries, letting the shower’s water wash away any tracks of tears. He remembers how it felt so good to be with Blake – cuddled up against the older man’s chest, head tucked under his chin. He remembers how safe he felt, how he could relax without being judged. He sighs and dries his body with a towel.

Adam’s heading downstairs with his towel wrapped around his waist and smells bacon and eggs. He scrunches his eyebrows together. _Did I have a guest? I don’t think so._ He runs through all the scenarios and guesses that it’s his mom since Behati was would have contacted him first. He contemplates of the possibility of it being Blake, considering that he never went to get the keys Blake had left. He shakes his head, _Impossible._ He returns upstairs to put on some pants and a shirt, knowing that his mother would prefer if he were more modest with his appearance. Sauntering down, he puts on a smile that he’s been trying to perfect to lie to his mother. However, the person he sees is most definitely _not_ his mother. His façade falls when the man in his kitchen smiles at him. Hey, Adam,” The man greets him.

Adam grins with honesty he hasn’t had in a while. “Jesse?” He asks, “How are you, man? Haven’t seen you in like, forever! Come here.”

Jesse snickers and walks to his friend, “Yeah, it has been a while.” They hug each other and pat each other’s backs. “Made some coffee over there. Just the way you like it.”

“Thanks,” Adam says sincerely. He plops himself at his dining table and leans back, relaxing. “Hey, why are you here at my house? Shouldn’t you be, like, with your family?”

As soon as Jesse puts the eggs and bacons on the plate, he sits next to Adam. “Thought I’d visit you,” he shrugs. “I also get the feeling that you and Behati aren’t exactly husband and wife anymore. And don’t lie to me; you had that ‘I’m gonna lie to my mother’ face when you came down.”

Adam laughs softly, “You always had that instinct of when I was down in the dumps.”

“Of course,” Jesse smirks. His face turns serious, “Is it about Blake?”

Nodding, Adam rambles, “I-I just wish he didn’t leave me. I want him with me. And-and yesterday, he just grabbed me to dance.” He curls into a ball in his seat, holding his mug in front of his face. He tries to relieve his suffering by breathing in the coffee’s scent. “Why?” He begins to wail. “Why? I wish he was here. When I was halfway down, I started hoping it was him. I knew it wouldn’t be him. I knew it! But I still wished he was here.

Jesse hugs his childhood friend and pats his back, “He thinks that you’re not available anymore. He thinks that you’ve moved on. I bet that if you weren’t married he’d be kissing your lips in front of everyone.”

“But he’s married too!” Adam cries.

“Actually,” Jesse stops and stares at Adam. _Oh, right, Adam doesn’t pay attention to the news much._ “Nevermind. Wait for Blake to tell you.”

“Tell me what?” Adam asks.

Jesse shrugs, “Ask him about what he hasn’t been telling you. You’ll also find some stuff on your laptop.” Right then, the door bell rings and Jesse stands to get the door.

Adam hears Jesse muttering with someone else. A female. Behati? He stands, wiping his face and heads to the door. He finds his wife’s solemn face with papers in her hands.

“Adam,” Behati says, a sad look in her eyes.

“Yeah?” Adam automatically responds to his name.

“I love you – I really do,” she speaks.

Adam opens his mouth to say something, anything.

Behati interrupts, “Don’t say anything – not yet. I love you, and I know you love me too. But I can’t make you happy, so I brought some divorce papers.”

“What?” Adam responds hoarsely.

“We’re going to have a divorce,” Behati states. “You love Blake; everyone knows. Blake’s single now or one reason or another. I don’t know, but Blake isn’t in a relationship right now.”

Adam repeats, “What?”

Behati sighs, “You really weren’t aware? I thought that you were going to divorce me as soon as you found out Blake is single. That’s what I thought when I found out. Honestly, pay attention! Blake’s single and he doesn’t have the ring on his hand. We love each other as simple friends – occasional make out buddies. And I’m actually about to hook up with someone else right now who recently became single. Goodness! So are you going to sign the papers or not?”

Speechless with her sudden change of attitude, Adam simply stares at her.

Jess softly chuckles, “As straightforward as always. C’mon buddy, it’s okay. You can tell the world about the divorce later. Like, maybe, after the show is over y’know.

Adam waves to the kitchen table while nodding slowly. He finally speaks a full sentence, “Let me get a pen.”

“Okay,” Behati replies, striding to the kitchen with her shoes on.

 _She’s not staying for long,_ Jesse thinks as he closes the door.

Right then, someone calls out, “Hey! Jesse! Keep the door open!”

Jesse looks up and sees James’ girlfriend. “Laurie? What are you doing here? Where’s James?”

The young lady shrugs, “We broke up a few days ago. Said he found someone else. I didn’t take it that badly – jus told him I was going to break up with him too. ‘Cuz I found another person.”

“Who?” Jesse asks, genuinely curious.

Laurie smiles, “She’s a wonderful and gorgeous. Actually, she should be getting her divorce now.” She nods her head toward the inside of the house.

“Behati?” Jesse gasps.

She nods.

Jesse opens the door wider, “Come on in. They should be done soon.”

When they enter the threshold, they find Adam hugging Behati saying, “Thank you.” “I’m sorry I couldn’t love you that way.” “You’re an amazing person.” “I always knew I didn’t deserve someone like you.” He’s crying openly, being comforted by someone he loves dearly.

Of course, Behati stopped comforting him and flicked his forehead after the last line. “If you didn’t deserve me, I wouldn’t have said yes.” She glares at the older man. “Good God! You and your self-esteem issues really need work.”

“But–“

“No ‘buts!’” Behati stops Adam from continuing. “I did love you. Hell, I love you now, but I loved you as a person in a relationship. I knew that you didn’t feel the same. You loved me as someone more than a friend but less than a lover. The one you want to be with is open now. You can go to him after this whole incident.”

Adam sighs, “Okay.”

Jesse clears his throat, “Umm… Behati? Someone’s here for you.”

Behati turns around and immediately smiles, “Hey, Laurie! Here, meet my soon-to-be-ex-husband. Then we can officially be together.”

“That’s good. I guess – think. I dunno,” Laurie blushes. “Hi, Adam.”

Adam gapes, “Laurie?!” He wipes away the tears on his face, forcing him to stop crying.

“Yup,” She looks at him cautiously, searching for approval.

Nodding, Adam smiles gently, “You be good to her, okay? She’s someone you can’t mess with.”

“Of course,” Laurie sighs in relief.

Adam looks back to the paper and finishes it. He looks up with a smile, “You two be happy. Behati, we can announce it through the press, right? We don’t need rumors of us breaking up – just tell the truth outright.”

“Yeah,” Behati nods, “People’s Magazine would be good.”

 “I can probably arrange an interview with them this weekend; I’ll call. And you can keep the ring – do what you want with it.” He leads them to the door with a smile. “I’ll see you later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: By no means do I wish for this to happen in real life. As far as I can tell, they are happily married, and as long as they're happy, they should be together.
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


	7. Starting Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "'You get sick and put into a hospital, and you leave the day you were admitted into it. Seriously?'"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next update for y'all! I'm going to see if I have time to write this week, but I doubt that since I'm going to be spending most of my time with my relatives and in a car. I also have two projects that I should be working on, but I won't be able concentrate until I get this chapter out. It'll probably be about two weeks before I get the next chapter out.
> 
> Enjoy reading! :)

Adam lands on his couch, feeling a bit woozy. He grabs a blanket that's sitting on the armrest and snuggles into the warmth. He's still cold. He calls out tiredly, "Jesse? Will you get me my coffee?"

Jesse leaves the kitchen with a cup of orange juice, "You already finished your coffee though. Remember? One coffee a day."

"I did?"

Nodding, Jesse turns around, "Yeah." He stops, "Dude, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

Adam answers, "Yeah, I'm just cold."

"Your heater's on and it's summer. Well, the end of summer but still summer. Did you take a pill for your hangover?" Jesse asks.

"Yeah. Open bottle in my bathroom." Adam tries to stand up but collapses forward onto his friend.

Jesse manages to catch Adam and not fall. He feels the heat radiating from him, "Adam! You're burning up, dammit! You're not 'fine'!"

Adam shrugs and backs up, falling on to the couch.

Jesse hurries up the stairs, entering the master bedroom. He finds a bottle of tequila on the floor and glances toward the bathroom. He sees all the medicine Adam owns on the floor and counter, shoved to the side. There's one bottle open, and it's the prescribed medicine for his ADHD. Jesse knows that Adam doesn't use it - he only uses over-the-counter meds for hangovers. "Fuck," he mutters harshly. Adam only got the ADHD medicine to avoid another argument with his mother and doctor, so he never tried it before.  _The medicine probably won't sit well with the alcohol Adam had last night,_  he thinks. Jesse runs down the stairs, speed dialing James to explain the situation and telling him to inform everyone of importance. He's in the living room when he ends the call and drags Adam to his car, buckling his friend into the passenger seat. He hops in to his car on the driver's side and backs out of the drive way, in to the alley. He speeds to the local hospital, ignoring the signs not giving a flying fuck if a police would start their alarm. Luckily, the roads were relatively empty, so they arrived at the local hospital within a few minutes. He stops at the emergency door and barges in with Adam draped across hi shoulder, shouting, "My friend has a really high fever after taking an ADHD pill, thinking it was an OTC medicine for a hangover."

The staff at the hospital immediately gets a room for Adam and runs through the formal information of identification and everything else. Within an hour, Adam's family and the band are waiting for Adam's bill of health. The band's manager is there, hoping that Adam would be okay. He's called the producer of  _The Voice_ to inform them of Adam's state, in case Adam can't make it to one of the recordings. James is on the phone talking to another person that he thinks should know about Adam's status of health. In another five minutes, the doctor comes out and says, "Mr. Levine stable at the moment. The pill that he took was Strattera, or Atomoxetine, which could have caused severe liver damage. Luckily, Mr. Carmichael got Mr. Levine here early. Otherwise, the situation could have been much worse."

Everyone in the room lets out a breath of relief.

"Mr. Levine is currently resting, but direct family may see him if they wish." The doctor continues.

Adam's mother smiles, "Thank you."

When Adam's mother leaves with her other children, another person bursts into the room, looking ragged and panicked, "Is Adam okay?" The man asks gruffly.

* * *

 

*5 minutes earlier*

Blake rolls around the grass with a constant pounding in his head. He realizes that he probably drank a whole back of beer when he arrived at their forest, but he shrugs it off like it's no big deal. He relishes in the dew coating the grass, hoping the cold will soothe his mind. He jumps when he hears his phone blaring. Crawling to the side of his truck, he props his back against it and fumbles with his phone. "Hellooo," he slurs.

"Blake!" A voice responds. "Thank God you picked up."

"Jaaames?" Blake asks, recognizing the voice.

The other man responds, "Yeah. I think you need to know something, but I don't think Adam will appreciate this."

Blake immediately sobers up, "What's wrong?"

"Well, Adam's sick-" James begins.

Blake cuts in, "Are you at his house?" He jumps into his car and starts the engine."

"No, we're at the local hospital, but-"

"I'll be there in five minutes," Blake presses the 'end' button on his phone and drives off.  _Adam. Adam. Please be safe. I need to apologize - say I love you._

He's at the hospital in five minutes, like he said. He hears the gruffness his voice when he demands, "Is Adam okay?"

Everyone in the room stares at him for a few minutes. James breaks the silence. "Uhh. Yeah. The doctor just told us. His family's watching him now. No visitors yet."

Blake releases the tension in his whole body and falls to the ground, "Thank  _God_."

"Why are you here?" Everyone in the band except James asks defensively, aware of the thing that went on between Adam and Blake.

"To say 'Sorry for being such a dick' to Adam. I won't ask him to be with me again because that'd make me feel shittier that I already do, but I'll still say sorry." Blake responds instinctively. "And James told me that Adam was sick, so I wanted to apologize before he, maybe, dies." Blake winces at his own words.  _Fuck, that came off as extreme douche-bag speaking._  "I mean, erm."

Adam's in the room speaking before Blake could continue. "That was a douche-bag way to say it, dude. Seriously? You want to apologize like that. Jee, that was the best apology I have ever seen in my life." He's staggering in a blue hospital gown with his arm around his brother. "Now can I have my clothes? I'm already feeling sick of this place."

Relaxing, Blake throws a lopsided grin onto his face, "Yeah, well, it's better than what it could have been. Anyways, you get sick and put into a hospital, and you leave the day you were admitted into it. Seriously?"

"Obviously." Adam rolls his eyes. He turns to his friends and family. "I'll leave with Shelton over here. We're going to need to talk about some stuff." Inside, Adam's feeling terrified of what would happen. He's wondering why the fuck Blake is here anyways. He pretty sure he's going to regret going with the country man for the day, but he knows he needs to sort out their situation. He sighs, "Just give me my clothes and we'll all be on our merry way."

Adam's mother looks carefully at her son and knows that Adam is determined to get everything under control. She nods, "Stay safe, sweetheart. Here's your bag of clothes." She moves in to hug him and he reciprocates the action.

"Thanks, mom."

She watches her son, "You get everything to a point where you won't be unhealthy and I'll be happy. You don't have to be together with him again if you don't want to, but I know that would make you happiest if you did. Still, do what you think is right, okay?"

"Yeah." Adam smiles at her. "I'll call you later."

"Good-bye, Adam. I'll be expecting a call by tonight. And I'll see you this weekend."

Adam nods, "Okay." He leaves for the men's room to change, leaving Blake with his friends. He waves at them, signifying they'll talk later and they can do what they want now. "See you guys later."

"See you." "Bye." "We'll be talking later." They all said at these phrases at the same time.

Adam relaxes, and smiles a true one that he hasn't had in a while.  _Finally, I'll be able to find peace._ He adds a somewhat bitter thought,  _Hopefully._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops. That wasn't as angsty as I thought it would have been. I guess that's a good thing.
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


	8. Silence And Insecurities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry! I had saved this chapter and thought I already posted it. I was going to post the next chapter today, but then I realized this one wasn't up yet. I don't want to bombard you with two semi-long chapters, so maybe I'll post the next one tomorrow. Again, I am so sorry!
> 
> Now, I hope you'll like this chapter. I'm wrapping this up with maybe 1 or 2 chapters.

While Blake drives them to Adam’s residence, they sit in silence. There are no sounds other than the highway’s buzzing. It’s a silence that they’ve come to appreciate between the two since they’re usually constantly talking. They use this rare silence to think over what they should say to each other.

Finally, Blake breaks the silence by saying, “You’re missing your ring.”

Looking down to his left hand, Adam notices that he already took off his wedding band. “Oh, yeah. We got divorced this morning.”

“No shit.” Blake balks. “Umm. Okay, then.”

“What about yours?” Adam asks.

Blake startles at the question. He thought that Adam had noticed the missing ring before but chose to ignore it. He thought Adam hadn’t forgiven him, which is also true. He also figured that his divorce with Miranda would have been on the news where Adam would see it. Then again, Blake thought, Adam might not have been paying attention to the news. “Oh, well, Miranda and I got divorced over the summer. She said that she made a mistake and that it would be better if I were happy with the one I love. She also found someone that she thinks that she deserves.”

“Oh,” Adam responds listlessly. They sit in the silence again, only this time, it’s until they arrive at Adam’s house. He thinks to himself, Then who is it that he truly loves? Is it me? No, it can’t be me. The other person must be special - to get Blake to divorce with Miranda. He wouldn’t divorce her to be with me, why would it be me? He softly sighs, feeling as though his heart was being twisted. It’s been a while since he’s felt this way. Heart clenching because he’s confused in love.

Blake parks his truck in front of Adam’s house. In the past, he would have just entered the driveway without a second thought, but now, he doesn’t go in to ensure he’s not overusing Adam’s tolerance. They exit the car and Adam uses his key to enter. He gestures for Blake to enter the house with him. “So…” He begins.

Blake fills in the rest of the sentence, “...we need to talk.”

“Yeah,” Adam nods. Suddenly, it hits him. We’re going to talk. Not just a greeting, but a full-blown conversation. His breathing begins to speed up; he feels his stomach roll around. He rushes to the bathroom and dry heaves into the toilet bowl. There’s nothing to come out since he hasn’t eaten much. Plus, he threw up this morning because of the alcohol. Why was I drinking again? Adam asks himself. Oh right, because Blake is a stupid asshole that I love and decided to dance with me at that club. He forgets that Blake was in the house and rests against the walls of the restroom. Startling at the slight knock on the door, Adam looks up and sees the country star, looking at him with concern.

“Adam? You okay buddy?” Blake stands next to the bathroom door to check on him and see if he needed to go to the doctor again. He watches his friend, concerned. He doesn't know what caused it, but he's sure that it had to do with needing to talk.

Adam waves a hand, "I'm fine."

Blake tilts his head, "Ya sure ya don't need anythin'?"

"Water would be good," Adam replies hoarsely.

Blake picks up Adam and brings him to the living room couch. He notices that nothing has changed since he left two years ago. The blanket that he gave Adam as a joke for his birthday is still draped across the couch. Taking the blanket off its usual spot, he covers Adam with it. He enters the kitchen, getting the ‘Adam’ mug and retrieving the water from the fridge’s filter. He’s humming to himself until the sound of a muffled sob arrives. He quickly returns to the place he left Adam at with the water in his hand. “Adam?” He calls out quietly.

“Blake,” Adam whimpers out, hugging the blanket around him. Crying while biting the blanket. He’s forgotten that the country man was still in his house. “Why? Why does everyone always leave me?” Because you’re a fool Adam. “Dad left the family. Jane left me. Ryan left the band. Blake left me. Now Behati’s leaving me. Blake wants to talk to me, but why?” To say that you’re a worthless piece of shit that nobody wants. Adam continues to sob harder. His self-question, self-answer session only making it worse. His eyes are tired when he feels someone hugging him. He thinks it’s probably his mother - the only one who knows him and would never leave him even if he were deadweight. He falls asleep, calling out to the person who left him but still holds a special place in his heart and life. “Blake… I love you...”

Blake hugs the younger man when he hears the way Adam was talking to himself. His heart stings now that he knows what Adam has been doing to himself the past two years. He sobs quietly while holding Adam in his arms. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I love you too. Don’t hurt yourself anymore. It has never been your fault. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I love you, Adam.”

* * *

Adam wakes up to the smell of bacon and eggs. He scrunches his brows in confusion. . The couch beneath him is pressed in and the blanket above him is warm. It smells like Blake. Suddenly, the memories hit him. Shit. Blake’s here. Adam sits up as images of last night enters. He stands, tossing off the blanket and heading to his lower level restroom that has his spare toothbrush. He thinks about what he should say to his best friend. Sighing, Adam sucks it up and enters the kitchen cautiously. He looks up and sees the country singer humming to himself softly. Adam leans against the wall while he watches Blake. He knocks softly on the cabinet, “Morning, cowboy.”

Blake turns at the sound. He forces out a smile, “Hey there, How ya doin’?”

“Peachy,” Adam answers. He shakes his head, “Why are you forcing yourself? I can read you like a book.”

Sighing, Blake places the food in the pan onto a plate. “Yeah, sorry about that. I- I dunno. What am I supposed to say? You deserve someone so much better than me. But what do I do? I don’t want you to be with anyone. I might have plotted Behati’s murder when I learned that y’all were marrying. Then I learn you’re a free man yesterday. I wanted to kiss you so badly. Say ‘I’m sorry.’ Say that I was stupid to leave you. Just tell you everything that you should have. Tell you that you’re fucking gorgeous. Tell you that you’re not stupid, cuz I’m the one who was stupid. Tell you that you’re worth so much more than me. But I’m selfish. I want you all to myself. Fuck - I love you. I didn’t want to lose my career and have everyone judge me, but that was me being stupid. If I really love you, I’d have dealt with all that shit cuz you’re the most important thing in my life. When James called, I thought you were going to die. I didn’t want you to die before I apologized. Dammit - I don’t know what I should say to you. If you hate me, you can kick me out right now.” Blake breathes in, panting and looks up at the younger man.

Adam stares at the country man, shocked. It’s evident in his expression. He opens his mouth, tries to put some words out, but he can’t. He doesn’t know what to say. He finally manages to stutter out, “I-I, umm, did I say anything last night?”

“Well, you were giving yourself the self-hatred talk and you said that you love me.” Blake blurts out without thinking.

Adam flushes red, “Yeah, sorry about that. Umm, yeah. Well, I do love you. So…”

Blake continues, “So… what do we do now? The doctor said that you need to take a break for at least three days.”

“What do you want to do?”

“Well, we both love each other, so maybe?” Blake wonders aloud.

Adam nods, “Yeah, but I don’t think I’m ready for another commitment yet.”

Blake agrees, “That’s a good idea. We could actually get our relationship back to being ‘best friends’ first, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

They let silence get in between them before Adam hesitantly asks, “Breakfast?”

Blake grins, “Definitely.”

Adam returns a tentative smile. “Good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! :)


	9. Forever Starts Tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'll always be with you. I'll never leave you. I'll stay with you forever and forever starts tonight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh! I'm so sorry! I forgot to say "Merry Christmas!" yesterday. If you don't celebrate Christmas then "Happy Christmahanakwanza!" That's for Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa. I don't actually know what people do for the last two holidays I mentioned, so I might as well say, "Happy Holidays!"
> 
> By the way, the title was inspired by the song "Forever Starts Tonight" by Tyler Ward, but this chapter has nothing to do with the song itself.
> 
> Moving on, I'm wrapping up with this chapter and the next one is the epilogue. Hope you'll like it! :)

*A Few Weeks Later*

Adam smiles while he leans into Blake’s touch. He’s not ready for them to have sex again yet, but cuddling is good. Cuddling is more than good. He’s smiling more now and he can feel it with the stretch of his muscles on his face. “Hey, Blake?” Adam asks softly while they’re still in the bed.

“Yeah?” Blake responds with a hum. “Ya need somethin’?”

Adam shakes his head, “No. I just wanted thank you. You helped me so much these last three weeks. If you weren’t here, I’d probably be drinking myself to oblivion.”

Blake softly chuckles, unable to resist poking fun with the younger man, “I’m the one who’s gonna be drinking into oblivion with all that beer I sneak into the studio.”

“I’m being serious!” Adam pouts, only to have a grin ruining his effect.

Blake outright laughs at his partner. He turns to look at Adam straight in the eyes with a earnest expression, “Glad you’re being serious cuz I’m bein’ serious too. After you drink yourself to oblivion, I really would drink myself into oblivion.”

Adam stops laughing immediately and looks at his boyfriend, “Blake, I won’t go down into the abyss now that I have you.”

“That’s good, cuz I plan on staying with you forever,” Blake says.

Adam blushes slightly, “We’ll see.”

Shaking his head, Blake declares, “We will be together forever unless you have any objections.”

“I won’t leave you,” Adam quickly adds on, desperate to ensure that Blake won’t misunderstand his feelings. “I will never leave you. I l-lo-love you,” he stutters out.

Blake smiles, “Good, cuz I love you too, Adam. And I don’t want to leave you. I'll always be with you. I'll never leave you. I'll stay with you forever and forever starts tonight."

Adam returns the smile and then grins mischievously, “What you said.”

“Oh, come on! You should say something cheesy that you made up yourself!” Blake half-heartedly protests, chuckling softly.

“Nope, Big Country!” Adam retorts gleefully, “You’re the sap in this relationship!”

Blake tackles the shorter man and smirks, tickling him.

Adam shrieks, trying to escape the larger man’s grip. He laughs, kicking out his feet, “Stop, oh my God. Stop! Uncle, uncle!” He shouts, giggling, “Fine, fine! You’re the first person I’ve ever actually wanted to spend forever with! Oh my God! Stop!” He wiggles out from the hold when Blake stops his assault, tears at the corner of his eyes from laughing to hard.

Blake peers at Adam, “Seriously?”

Nodding, Adam replies, flushing red, “Yeah. Very first person I’ve wanted to be with forever.”

Blake smiles. Adam beams back. They whisper together, “Forever starts tonight.” They share a chaste kiss, telling each other ‘Good night.”


	10. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of their journey.

*End of The Voice: Season 7*

“Congrats, man,” Adam playfully punches Blake after leaving the stage. “Craig was really good, but I still think Matt is number one.”

Blake grins, “Thanks, buddy. I thought that Matt was gonna win to be honest, but damn, I’m glad Craig won. That makes four wins for me and two for you.”

Sticking out his tongue, Adam pouts, “No bragging!” He turns to see the other two coaches, “Hey Gwen, Pharrell! Better luck next time. It comes with practice.”

Gwen smiles while rolling her eyes, “Obviously. So, how are you? Adam, seem a lot better than when we first met.”

“Yeah,” Pharrell nods. “You had this dark, ominous look at the beginning of the season. We didn’t want to bring it up since we thought that it might have been you being you.”

Adam grimaces, “Yeah, I was actually in some depressed state or something like that.”

Gwen looks up at that comment, “Are you okay? You don’t need to tell us why. If you’re sad, you can just say you’re sad. Don’t bottle it up - that’s unhealthy. Are you still depressed? I don’t think so, but still. Are you happy?”

Adam is surprised at the rush of words, “Yeah, thanks Gwen. Blake helped me through it.”

“You were the one to start the therapy. You chose to, sweetheart,” Blake drawls. He leans down to peck the younger man’s lips.

Carson comes up behind them, clearing his throat. “I know this is the happiest you two have been since two years ago, but please, keep it out of the work place.” He gives a magazine to the other two bewildered coaches. “It’s official; these two are lovers now.”

Pharrell chuckles softly, “Well, that explains the display of affection just now. We thought they’d get together eventually, but already? That’s fast.”

Whistling quietly, Gwen agrees, “Thought it would take at least another half a year for them to actually start macking on each other’s lips.”

Adam and Blake looks at each other and the gives a glance to Carson.

Gwen sees the shared eye contact, “I feel like there’s a secret that we don’t know about.”

“There definitely is a situation that we’re not aware of,” Pharrell gives pointed looks to the three men.

Carson sighs, “They were actually going at it two years ago. Y’know that ‘big fight’ when Blake and Miranda were together?”

Gwen shakes her head while Pharrell nods.

“Anyways, that’s when everyone thought Blake and Miranda were going to split. They stayed together for half a year before officially divorcing,” Carson continues. “They stayed together because Blake broke it off with Adam then. Then it leads to a very sad Adam and a slightly drunk Blake. Miranda was very understanding, but they couldn’t get back together since Adam was too absorbed in himself.” Carson shrugs and smiles fondly, “But now they’re back together, and they’ll probably die together.”

Blake pokes at Cason’s head, “OMG! You’re gonna jinx it!”

“Stop that!” Adam groans, “You’re a grown man!” He moves to smack his boyfriend.

Blake grins, running before he can get properly hit, “See ya later!”

“See you guys!” Adam shouts before he begins to chase the larger man, “Get back here, Shelton!”

Pharrell smiles, “They’ll make a happy couple.”

“Definitely,” Gwen nods in agreement. “An odd one to boot.”

“They’ve already been labeled as ’The Odd Couple’ before. They already have that title,” Carson shakes his head with a grin spreading across his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! The last chapter of this. This fic. Thank you all for reading and dealing with my inconsistent updates. I'm going to return to working on 'Lost' after I finish a one shot that I should have up by the first two weeks of 2015.
> 
> Again, Thank you very much! :)


End file.
